One Last Diaper

      "…if you care for me like you say you do, then you'll meet me at Julien's…" That was the last message Janine left on Lavinia's cell phone. It was the last of many such messages that Janine had left, none of which had yet been answered. As Janine walked nervously in the cold city streets, she wondered whether or not Lavinia would bother to listen to her this time.

      Janine had been engaged for more than a year to her wonderful boyfriend, Jerome. At least, she thought he was wonderful; he had a chronic case of lateness, no matter what the function, and he absolutely hated romantic comedies (they were all the same, he complained). On the other hand, he shared Janine's unnatural affinity for hummus, and he wasn't at all averse to snuggling on the couch in front of the TV, no matter what movie was on. One night he called Janine and said he would walk her home from work, and as they stopped in front of a café full of people he went down on one knee and produced a small diamond ring. Hopping with excitement, Janine said yes, and the café erupted with applause.

      Janine began her preparations in earnest, and now a week before the wedding she was nearly ready. The menu was written, the flowers ordered, the church prepared, and the reception hall reserved. To the outside observer the next week should have been smooth sailing for Janine, but there was one minor snag that kept Janine awake at night, and that snag's name was Lavinia.

      All things considered, Lavinia took the news of Janine's engagement rather well. When Janine told her, she smiled and kissed her on the cheek, saying how happy she was that Janine was so happy. They continued to see each other as the months passed, but soon Janine became busy with wedding preparations, and Lavinia's calls, inviting Janine to another playtime session at her mansion outside of the city, were often turned down. Now, when Janine needed to talk to her the most, Lavinia was suddenly silent.

      'Come on, Lavinia, answer!' Janine dialed again and again every day, hoping for a response. Perhaps Lavinia had realized what Janine had realized months ago while planning her wedding: there wouldn't be much time to spend with one another after Janine was married. In fact, there might not be any time at all. She could only imagine what was going through Lavinia's mind right mind right now.

      Guiltily Janine imagined Lavinia, sitting alone in her house, sitting stiffly in the tall armchair that she kept in her study: the curtains drawn over the tall, stained-glass windows. She might be holding a cup of tea on a saucer, her pinky pointed outwards, but the tea growing colder every minute as she forgot about it and stared into space. Janine had spent many nights in that big, melancholy mansion: a throwback to a bygone era, but a personal haven for herself and Lavina on many a weekend. There were probably stacks and stacks of diapers that Lavinia had hoped to use, and the baby bottles were being kept spotlessly clean for the moment that Janine should arrive. She needed to talk to her as soon as possible, if only she would pick up her phone!

      Finally, a week before the wedding, Janine picked up her phone and dialed again. Again there was no answer, but Janine knew what she needed to say.

      "Look, I don't know what's going on, but if you care for me like you say you do, then you'll meet me at Julien's when I get off of work."

      Janine was about to hang up, but then quickly added, "Please be there, Mommy."

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      Janine was walking down the street when her phone rang. She hoped that it would be a response from Lavinia, but she knew from the ringtone that it was someone else no less important. Janine had chosen a unique ringtone to tell her when Jerome was calling: an upbeat, catchy tune full of high-pitched 8-bit beeps and boops. Janine didn't even need to listen to the whole ring to know that it was Jerome on the other end of the line. The pitch of the first note was enough to tip her off, and cause her hand, without thinking, to reach down and snatch her phone out of her purse.

      "Hi honey!" Janine answered, barely suppressing a squeal of delight. "Yeah, I'll be at my Mom's tonight…well, not now. I'm actually on my way somewhere tonight. Yeah, I'm meeting a friend of mine…yes I could call her, but this friend is kind of special. I'm just going to have coffee and come home, as soon as I find out that she's coming. Oh, okay honey. I…I'll see you tomorrow…good night. I love you."

      Janine hung up, standing still for a few minutes as she stared at her phone dreamily. 'I'm going to be married soon!' Then, remembering where she was supposed to be, she shook herself out of her loving stupor and hurried down the block. She soon arrived at Julien's.

      Julien's was a small café, fancy, yet understated, that stayed open late, keeping one waiter on duty at all times for its small-but-dedicated late-night/early-morning clientele. Julien himself opened the door as Janine approached.

      "Your friend has been here quite a while. I knew that it was you she was waiting for."

      "Thanks, Julien. Good to see you again."

      "And you. Congratulations, by the way!"

      It did not take long to find Lavinia, who was sitting in their usual table with an espresso nearby: an espresso which she had yet to touch. Janine sat down and looked into her friend's eyes. Lavinia stared disappointedly back, like a parent whose child had just gotten detention at school.

      "Well, I'm here." Lavinia brusquely declared. "What do you want to talk about?"

      "I need to know if you're coming to my wedding or not."

      "I don't know," she said, fidgeting with her napkin. "I'll have to see if I can fit it in."

      "Don't be like that. You know that I've been really busy. Believe it or not, when we're not playing house I'm actually a big girl with a life of my own."

      "That doesn't mean you can't come over every once in a while! It's been four months since you came to the house, and every time I called you said that you were meeting the caterer, or you were going with Jerry to do some damned thing. I just…" Lavinia broke off her stern gaze and glance worriedly down at the table. "It just feels so lonely."

      Janine sighed, and put her hand over Lavinia's. "You can't keep going on like this. We both knew that a day like this would come."

      Lavinia said nothing. The only sound in the café was that of the piano player in the corner, playing a gentle pianissimo with the caress of his fingers. The waiter arrived at their table with milk for Janine. With a nod Janine thanked him, then mixed in the sugar and peppermint, though she didn't drink it. She just stirred to pass the time as she waited for some kind of answer.

       "I want you to be happy, dear," Lavinia began, almost whispering. "You know that there's nothing I want more, but…what am I supposed to do?"

      Janine squeezed Lavinia's hand and offered her a kind smile. "I'll always be your friend, and I'll never forget those days when we'd play in the nursery: riding that old rocking horse and playing with dollhouse that belonged to your mom. Most of all, I'll remember when you took me outside onto the lawn, diaper and all. I was so worried about going outside, but we lay out on the grass together, safe behind that big brick wall of yours. I never thought I could feel as free as I did on those summer days, and I have you to thank for that. Just remember the good times, and you won't feel so lonely."

      Lavinia nodded sadly.

      "Will you be at the wedding then?"

      Lavinia sighed. "Of course, if it'll make you happy."

      "Thank you so much! There's just one more thing I need to ask you to do: will you come to my bachelorette party?"

      Lavinia shifted in her seat. "Oh, I don't know."

       "But Lavinia! This this is my last chance to hang out with you and everybody else before I get married. We're going to the Bear Mountain Resort up north. There's a casino and stores, and all sorts of cool stuff! We can hang out one last time before I'm married: won't that be fun?"

      Lavinia fidgeted in her chair, trying to shrug the whole thing off. Janine saw she was getting nowhere, but she had one idea left. She leaned in close and whispered, "If you come with me, then I'll give you one last evening of playtime."

      Lavinia stopped fidgeting and looked Janine in the eye. She did not say yes, but Janine could see that she was having second thoughts. She had to sweeten the deal.

      "I'll do whatever you want: bottles, pacifiers, diapers, training pants, little frilly dresses, onesies: anything."

      "Anything?"

      "Yes. It'll be our last playtime before I'm married, but I'll only do it if you come with me."

      Lavinia thought about it, and that stern, kind look returned to her face. "I want to hear you promise."

      "Lavinia, I promise that if you come to my bachelorette party, I will spend an entire evening with you, just the two of us in a hotel room, playing house: I'll be the baby, and you'll be the mommy. Nothing, and I mean nothing, will stand in our way."

      A hopeful glimmer appeared in Lavinia's eye. Janine squeezed her hand again and looked at her pleadingly with her big, green eyes.

      "I promise."

      "Alright, I'll come, but you'd better not cancel!"

      "Oh, thank you! I'm so happy that you're coming, and don't worry: I'll be ready." Janine drank her milk in one swig and kissed Lavinia on the cheek. "I have to go now, but I'll pick you up on Friday. Make sure you're ready."

      Lavinia nodded and smiled. As Janine left the café and said goodbye to Julien, she breathed a sigh of relief. Maybe if Lavinia took some time away from that mansion she would feel better. It would help set Janine's mind at ease as well, for knowing that Lavinia wasn't happy with her fun made her quite worried.
      

      The weekend came swiftly for Janine. Her friend from work, Kelly, drove her back to her apartment to change clothes and pick up her suitcase. They quickly picked up Janine's friends, Gina and Skye, and drove to the outskirts of the city to Lavinia's mansion.

      Janine's friends couldn't help but notice the large house, built of brownstone, set behind a brick wall that encompassed the entire property. They stared suspiciously at the reserved, dignified woman who waited at the gate for the car to arrive. Conservatively dressed, Lavinia's blue skirt reached down to her ankles, and underneath the long-sleeved jacket she wore a white, silk shirt. She stood beside a large stack of luggage.

      "I don't know how we're going to put all of this stuff in the car." Kelly complained. "You did tell this lady that we're only going to be there for a weekend, right?"

      "Just do what you can, Kel. It'll be alright." Skye and Gina were making room in the back seat for her to squeeze in, but were having a little trouble. In the end, however, all of the luggage passengers fit inside, however tightly, and the packed car sped down the long, winding highway into the mountains.

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      Janine had warned Lavinia that she would have to work a little for her night of playtime. That meant playing the slots, seeing shows, eating at all of the restaurants, and genuinely trying to have a good time before Janine even set foot near a diaper. Lavinia seemed to be holding her end of the bargain too. On the casino floor she took a seat at the blackjack table, and when the others found her nearly an hour later she had accumulated five-hundred dollars. No one could believe it.

      The next morning they all decided to take in a magic act at the resort theater. Lavinia and Janine sat close together, talking excitedly when they saw the illusionist balance a woman on the end of a pole, and then took her down to be sawed in half.

      "Little Janine would have loved to see this," Lavinia whispered.

      "Shh! We'll talk about it later."

      What Janine and her friends did for the rest of the day would take far too long to recount, but by the late afternoon everyone was in high spirits, if a little tired. Lavinia however, was growing impatient.

      "Janine, honey, when are we going to go upstairs?"

      "Lavinia, just give me a little longer. I want to walk through the casino some more."

      "Janine, you promised that we would have some fun tonight. I did my part and had some fun, so now it's time for you to uphold your part of the bargain. Let's go."

      "Lavinia, will you just relax? I just want to hang out a little more. Can't you wait a little-"

      "Janine, come here now!" Lavinia whispered fiercely. Janine jumped back in fright. Lavinia had those furrowed brows that Janine had seen several times when she had behaved badly at the house. Something within Janine caved in, and she told her friends to go on. She and Lavinia needed some rest.

      "Lavinia, are you sure that we have to-"

      "Young lady, be quiet! As of right now you are my little girl, and you are coming with me!"

      "But Lavinia-"

      "Janine! That is no way to talk to your mother." She held out her hand. "Come along."

      "Yes."

      "Yes who?"

      Janine fidgeted with her fingers and looked down at the ground. "Yes, mommy."

      Lavinia smiled as she took Janine's hand and led her away from the casino floor. They returned to their floor and reentered their darkened room, and Lavinia told her to sit on the bed. Once she was seated Lavinia began undressing her.

      "These clothes are a little too grown up; wouldn't you agree?" She removed Janine's high heels, running her fingers teasingly along the soles of her feet. Janine stifled a giggle, which made Lavinia smile all the more.

      "Is mommy's little girl ticklish?" Janine teasingly shook her head.

      "Oh, so little Janine won't mind if mommy touches her feet again?" Janine then quickly pulled her feet back out of Lavinia's grip. Lavinia laughed.

      "Well, we'll see about that later." Lavinia removed everything herself: Janine's dress, her pantyhose, and bra, and when she was finished she thrust Janine's outfit into an empty duffle bag, then locked it up in a closet.

      "That takes care that. I have some much prettier clothes for you, Janine, but first, you need something special." Lavinia ran over to one of her numerous duffle bags and pulled out a large package of diapers. Ripping it open, she pulled one out and unfolded it before Janine's naked form. Showing it to her, Lavinia asked, "Are you ready for your new diapee?"

      As she lay back on the bed, naked and waiting to be diapered, Janine thought of Jerry and what he might think of her like this. A flicker of doubt traveled through her mind, and though she considered calling this whole thing off, she looked at Lavinia's kind, eager face, and then at the diaper, which seemed so soft and clean: whose papery, padded form could soon cuddle her bottom and make her feel warm and fuzzy all over. For now, she could put everything aside and make one more journey. Janine nodded her head, and Lavinia went to work.

      In a few moments Janine was completely dressed. She lay back on the bed, wearing her thick, bulgy diaper. It stuck out just a little bit beyond the pink, gauzy frills that decorated the skirt of her dress. Over Janine's chunky calves Lavinia unrolled thin, pink knee-socks, and then tied her hair into pigtails which stuck out of the sides of Janine's head. Janine lay there, absent-mindedly sucking her fingers as Lavinia laid out everything else in the room. In about half an hour, Lavinia was ready.

      "Okay, Janine. Are you hungry?"

      "Yah," Janine responded, reaching towards her mommy. Lavinia smiled and helped her toddle over to the corner of the room, where there was a chair and a bottle warmer. Lavinia sat down and helped Janine onto her lap. As they waited for the bottle of formula to warm up, Lavinia rocked Janine as she lay back in her arms, and sang a quiet little song. Janine smiled and closed her eyes, wanting nothing more than to listen to Lavinia sing for the rest of the evening.

      It reminded her of the times before she had met Jerome, when she and Lavinia would get together every weekend and have playtime. Often she would travel to Lavinia's mansion at the edge of the city, which seemed so big that it made her feel like a little girl whenever she approached it. Janine would walk into the parlor (Lavinia was the only person she knew who actually had a parlor), and wait. Lavinia would then walk in, wearing a long, old-fashioned dress, and ask in a kind, gentle voice, "Hello, little girl; did you come all this way by yourself?"

      Then she would give Janine a kiss on the forehead, which made Janine flush with excitement. "Let's get you some milk and cookies, then."

      "Yay! Thank yoo, mommy!" Janine would then toddle off to the kitchen, holding Lavinia's hand.

      Janine felt the rubber nipple poking her lips, and without thinking she opened up and let it slip in. Everything was coming back to her now. She sucked greedily, trying to take in little gulps as fast as possible to get that warm, tasty milk down into her stomach.

      "Not so fast, precious; if baby drinks too fast she'll get a tummy-ache." Janine drank the entire bottle in no time, but Lavinia was ready with another one.

      "It's been such a long time since mommy fed her little girl. I'm not sure that she's been eating enough lately. Have you been drinking your milk every day, honey?"

      Janine shook her head, looking up at Lavinia with her big, green eyes.

      "Well, that's okay, honey." Lavinia stroked Janine's cheek, causing her to smile. "We'll just have to make up for lost time."

      Altogether Janine sucked down three full bottles of baby formula. It was more than she'd ever drank before. Her stomach felt big, full, and satisfied, like that of a real baby. Lavinia sat her up and began patting her back. Though full, Janine felt nothing, but then suddenly she let out a huge belch that echoed throughout the room.

      "My goodness! Janine is such a little piggy! Who's a little piggy," Lavinia asked as she tickled Janine's nose. "Who's a little piggy? Who's a piggy? You are! You are!" Janine only giggled in reply. She had no thought of Jerome or of her friends downstairs in the casino. Janine only thought of diapers, blankets, stuffed teddy bears, and of Lavinia, who snuggled her tight as if she would never her let go.

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      Lavinia had strewn the floor with dozens of toys, and for the next two hours Janine was allowed to roam about and play to her heart's content. She crawled along the carpet, waving her diapered bottom in the air as she moved from toy to toy. Lavinia followed her closely, playing along with whatever Janine was in the mood for. Sometimes Janine would pick up a stuffed bear and look at it curiously. Lavinia would then pick up another stuffed animal and start making funny voices for it.

      Once, Janine managed to crawl under one of the beds. "Oh my, I wonder where Janine is. I hope she isn't hiding somewhere." Lavinia made a big show of pretending to look around the room. Janine just giggled, quite forgetting that she was supposed to be hiding. Finally Lavinia found her, and Janine started laughing as she was dragged back out by her feet. Lavinia got down on her knees and hugged her. "I found you! I found you, and I'll never lose you again!" It was just like the old days again.

      It was getting late, and after a while Janine was just sitting still on the floor. She leaned forward as her eyes started to grow heavy, but she would perk up again before she could fall forward. "Bed time, honey."

      "Nooooo…I don't wanna go at bed," Janine whined drowsily. "I wanna play wif you some mooooore."

      "I want to play with you too, honey, but it's time for good little girls to go to sleep." Lavinia kissed Janine on the cheek and lifted her to her feet. She then walked her drowsy little girl over to her bed. Lavinia tucked Janine in with her favorite baby blanket, and then gave her another kiss on the forehead. Janine smiled sleepily, and taking one more look at her mommy, she closed her eyes went off to sleep.

      This was it: the last time she and Lavinia would ever play together. It had been a long time since Janine had played like this, and she regretted that soon it would come to an end. She knew that once she woke up again there would be no more diapers or dresses, or little teddy bears. Maybe, though, she could have one final dream, and maybe for a few more hours, as she slept in her diaper and wrapped herself in her warm blankie, she could at least pretend that it would never end.

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      It wasn't a noise that made Janine wake up: it was more like a feeling that something in the room wasn't quite right. Her eyes slowly opened upon a dark room. The only things visible were the bright red numbers on the digital clock. It was very early in the morning; why hadn't Kelly and the others woken her up? For that matter, why hadn't Lavinia woken her up to change her clothes? Panicking, Janine tried to get out of bed, but something blocked her. He reached out and grabbed it: a cold, smooth, metal bar.

      In fact there were dozens of them, not just in front of Janine but all around her. Janine got up on her knees and reached around them, pulling herself up to the top.

      "Lavinia? Lavinia! What's with all of the bars around the bed?"

      Janine heard a groan in the darkness. Her eyes had adjusted a little, but all she could see was a large lump turning on the other side of the room.

      "What's wrong baby? Are you hungry again?"

      "No, I'm not hungry! Get me out of this bed and help me change! Kelly and the others are going to be back any second!"

      "I'm coming, I'm coming. Jeez, you could've given me a little more time to sleep." A shape stood up and turned on the light. Lavinia, dressed in her long, silk nightgown, drowsily walked over and reached out for Janine.

      "Come on, Janine," she yawned. "Let's see what the trouble is."

      "Lavinia, I'm not playing games anymore. We have to get all of this stuff cleaned up before the girls-"

      Janine was silenced when Lavinia suddenly whisked her out of her bed, lifting her high into the air and then cradling her gently in her arms. Janine was stunned by her sudden flight, as well as the fact that Lavinia had picked her up with all of the difficulty of lifting a bag of sugar."

      "H-how did you do that?"

      Lavinia bent her neck and took a quick sniff. She then touched the front of Janine's diaper. "Well, your diaper's not wet. Don't tell me you're hungry again; you drank three bottles before I put you to bed."

      Janine hadn't forgotten that. The pressure in her bladder told her that it was all about to come back on her, but she had more important issues to deal with.

      "Look, I don't care how you picked me up, but you've gotta put me down right now. If the others see us like this we're done for!"

      "Was it a bad dream, honey? Mommy has bad dreams whenever she sleeps in a strange place." Lavinia bent down again and rubbed her nose against Janine's. "Aw, you miss your crib, don't you? Well don't worry, baby, we'll go home first thing in the morning, and I'll put you down for a nice nap. How's that sound, huh?"

      "Will you stop it?! For God's sake, we have to get this stuff cleaned up now!" She started pushing and squirming, hoping that Lavinia would lose her grip. She feared that at any moment the girls would come back from a night of gambling and find the strangely dressed pair and discover their secret. Janine pushed, kicked, shouted, and cursed, absolutely terrified of what might happen.

       "Uh oh, it looks like we've got a fussy baby on our hands." Lavinia began to bounce Janine up and down, making a mockery of her efforts to escape. "Fussy baby, fussy baby, wrapped in dough and dipped in gravy!"

      "Lavinia, stop it!" Janine sobbed. She was so afraid of being caught, and so tired from pushing and kicking that she burst into tears. Wearily she lifted her arms and limply beat her fists against Lavinia's breast. "Please…let me go!"

      "Aw, don't cry, Janine. Looky here," Lavinia sat down on the bed and reached into a nearby bag. "I have something for you."

      It was Janine's old pacifier. She hadn't used it in months, but it was right there in front of Janine's face. The faint scent of vanilla wafted through the air as Lavinia pushed it closer. Janine tried to push it back, but she was too weak, and Lavinia too persistent. Lavinia plopped it into Janine's mouth, then pushed back Janine's hands whenever she tried to pull it out. Despite herself, Janine discovered that even as she tried to remove the pacifier, she was already sucking on it.

      "Stop it, Janine, stop it! You hafta change my clothes before…before…"

      "There now, that's a good girl. You just keep sucking until you drop off to sleep again. Don't worry; Mommy will chase away the bad dreams."

      Janine was still worried about her friends coming back, and she needed to go to the bathroom badly, but the pacifier, with its soft rubber nub and vanilla taste had soothed her quite a bit. She felt the warmth of Lavinia's body through her silk nightgown, and relaxed of her strong arms.

      "Maybe they won't come back yet," Janine reasoned. "I don't hafta get dressed right now if Mommy thinks it's okay." Janine settled back into Lavinia's arms and rested, thankful for this moment to play baby a little longer.

      "I bet that bad dream made you scared, huh? You know what makes me feel better when I'm scared?" Janine looked up into Lavinia's shining, lovely eyes as she listened.

      "Mommy likes to think about home, where she's always safe and happy. Let me tell you about your home: it has a big, brick wall around it, and behind that there's a nice green lawn. Don't you remember, baby?"

      Janine did remember the wall, and the nice, green lawn that she and Lavinia would lie on in the summer. This wasn't her home though, was it?

      "And inside there's a big living room with lots of books and a grand piano. Mommy's favorite chair is in there, and right next to it is a little chair for you when you're big enough. Janine sleeps in the nursery, with a big, fancy doll house. She's got her own rocking horse to ride too. You like your horsie, don't you?"

      Janine did like that rocking horse: it's shiny wood finish, the dirty, coarse tail made out of unraveled rope, and the soft, spongy mane that she occasionally pulled pieces off of when she madly rocked back and forth. She hadn't ridden it in months, much to her dissapointment. Maybe it was time for another visit.

      "I wanna ride tha horsie one more time. Tha horsie is really fun!"

      "Oh! I see you smiling. It seems my little baby's lost all of her grumpy, huh." Lavinia poked Janine in the tummy and watched gleefully as a smile spread across Janine's face.

      "Mommy, don' poke me! I'm ticklish!"

      "You're such a sweet little girl. The only thing that could ruin this is a wet diaper."

      Janine suddenly remembered her bladder, the pressure was still there, but if she could get to the toilet she could take care of herself with no problem.

       "Mommy, I hafta go da bafroom."

      "You had such a big dinner, I thought for sure when you woke up that you had wet your widdle diapee. With Mommy's luck you'll probably wait until you go to sleep, and then wake her up again to change you."

      Janine shifted in her place, holding her wee in but eager to leave none the less. "Mommy, I gotta go tha bafroom! It's really important. Listen to mee!" Janine had used a diaper before, but it wasn't something she particularly enjoyed. She hoped that Lavinia would finally listen to her and take her to the bathroom.

      No luck. "I'll be so glad when you're potty trained. Remember this morning when we were in that gift shop? All of those people smelled your little stinky and we had to find a bathroom? Mommy didn't mind, though. You can do a big stinky any time you want to!"

      "Mommy, Mommy…" Janine pulled at Lavinia's dress, trying to get her to listen. She twisted restlessly in Lavinia's arms as the pressure mounted. She thought she could hold it in, but now she was growing less and less comfortable with every passing moment.

      "Shh, no more fuss." Lavinia stroked Janine's hair and squeezed her a little tighter.

      Janine gasped as she leaked a little into her diaper. "Mommy, please put me down! I can't…I…I hafta go to tha bafroom! I'm gonna esplode! Please let me go! I don' wanna pee in my diapees; I don' wike dat!"

     "It's okay, baby; just relax, and everything will be fine."

     "No, I don' wanna pee-pee my diapee," Janine moaned. 'I wanna go da bafroom. Don' wet me pee my diapee, Mommy!" Janine could feel herself slipping, control of her bladder gradually disappearing. "I can't…I…I…"

      Finally it was gone. Tears welled up in her eyes as Janine felt a warm, wet patch on her crotch grow bigger and bigger, the soft padding of her diaper absorbing every drop of her mess, but still leaving her feeling dirty and sad. Janine hated that dirty feeling, and trapped in Lavinia's arms she had no worries about throwing her head back and bawling her eyes out.

      "Aww, what's the matter now?" Janine felt Janine's diaper, discovering the source of her little girl's discomfort. "I guess I lucked out, baby! Now I can change you and get some sleep tonight. Come on, let's go in the other room and get changed.

      Janine was still crying when Lavinia opened up the door to the other part of the suite, but she suddenly saw something in the next room that made her stop briefly. She saw her friends sprawled on a double bed, sound asleep. All of them wore diapers too! Thickly padded and snuggled together for warmth, Kelly, Skye, and Gina slept soundly with pacifiers in their mouths, dressed up in soft, footie pajamas and pink onesies.

      Janine eyed her friends curiously, still sobbing because of her dirty diaper. Lavinia laid her on a blanket and peeled back the soiled garment.

      "That's not so bad, Janine. It's just a little pee-pee. You'll feel all better once you're dry."

      Janine was quickly soothed by the feeling of a cool, clean diaper wipe against her skin. Her sobs died down and turned to contented sighs as Lavinia cleaned her. If there was no worse feeling than that of wearing a dirty diaper, then the ultimate relief was having that diaper changed. Soon the stink and the dirtiness were gone, and Janine was quickly fitted with a soft, dry, clean diaper. Once again she felt secure as Lavinia fastened the tabs around her waist.

      Suddenly there was a moan coming from the bed. Kelly sat up in bed, wearing a pink onesie and clinging to her blanket. She rubbed her eyes and searched the darkened room.

      "Mama?" she called pitifully into the darkness.

      "Yes, honey; I'm coming!" She turned to Janine, whose feet were waving playfully in the air. "What does your sister want now?"

      "Sistuh? Kewwy's my sistuh! Dat's coowl!"

      Lavinia picked Kelly up and put her over her shoulder. After carrying her to Janine's room, she came back with a bottle and fed her. After a little while Kelly drifted back off to sleep, and Lavinia tucked her back into bed. Drawing a big blanket over the girls, she picked Janine up again and brought her back to the other room.

      It was nearly morning, and the sky was growing brighter and brighter. "It looks like there's no point in going back to sleep, honey." Lavinia yawned and sat back down on the bed. "We'll wake your sisters up later, but right now we can just sit here and have some fun: you and me." Lavinia then tiredly, but happily, balanced Janine on her knee, bouncing her up and down.

      "Now say my name, Janine; who am I?"

      "Dat's silly, Mommy; yoor Wavinia, wight?"

      "Come on, honey, say 'mama'."

      "Mommy."

      "Come on, say 'mama': ma…ma."

      "I sayin it, Mommy! Mom-mee!"

      "Ma…ma…"

      "Is say Mommy!"

      "Say it for Mama: mama."

      "I-gabah…Mommom…"

      "Come on, you're almost there."

      "…Momma…Mom...ma…mama!"

      "Oh honey! I'm so proud of you!" Lavinia gave Janine a loving squeeze, holding her close like she had never done before."

      "Ma ma! Mamama!

      "I'm so proud of you. When we get home, you, me, and all your little sisters, I'll take care of you forever and ever. I'll always be there: changing your diapers, feeding you your bottle of milk every night, burping you and putting you to sleep in your little crib. We'll be safe, you and I, and we'll always have each other."

      "Mmah, ma…ma…" Janine's eyes were growing heavy, and she began drifting away: lulled to sleep by Lavinia's soft, reassuring heartbeat.

      Suddenly Janine heard another noise. It was faint and muffled, but distinct in the soft, comfortable confines of the hotel room: electronic, piercing, and upbeat. It triggered a memory for Janine: one of changing her clothes as soon as she entered the hotel room, and putting her cell phone in the drawer in the nightstand. She didn't remember if she had turned it off or not before leaving the room, that didn't matter. It was ringing now, and it was that familiar, up-tempo ringtone that Janine knew so well. Janine's mind began to focus through the haze.

      "Je…jerry…"

      Lavinia turned pale. "K-keep quiet now, baby. You have to rest before we leave."

      "Buh-but Jerry! I gotta answer my phone!"

      "There is no phone! Stay still and I'll give you your pacifier."

      Something wasn't right. Janine looked up at Lavinia, who seemed quite nervous.

      "Let me go."

      "Honey, it's okay. You have to eat breakfast soon."

      "No, no I don't!" Janine, remembering some of her old strength, pushed away from Lavinia. She wriggled and squirmed, so much so that Lavinia had to hold her tight with both arms to prevent her from escaping.

      "Stop it, Janine! Mommy's going to drop you if you don't stand still."

      "You're not my mommy, Lavinia! Let me go!"

      Lavinia held on as tightly as possible, but it was no use. Janine had remembered her grown-up muscles and was using all of them to wrench herself free. She fell onto the floor, then staggered to her legs: dazed, but determined.

      'Something is causing this!' she told herself. 'Lavinia has some sort of device that's confusing me. I have to find it!' Her mind was a little foggy, and the room felt cold and uncomfortable once she fell out of Lavinia's arms, but Janine kept her mind focused on Jerry and quickly began to tear the room apart, searching for the thing that had made her so confused.

      "Young lady…you come back here right now! You listen to your mother and come back here this instant." Lavinia was shaking with anger, but Janine ignored her and kept moving, tearing apart the toys and baby supplies that littered the floor.

      'It has to be in here somewhere!' Janine scanned the room desperately, leaning on the bed because of her wobbly legs. She knew that this room wasn't real, but she felt that whatever was confusing her was nearby. She did her best to focus, keeping Jerry in her mind and tuning out Lavinia's scolding. She felt which direction she should go, and took some small, weak steps in that direction.

      Suddenly Lavinia grabbed her from behind, squeezing her tightly and trying to drag her back.

      "Janine, please listen to me! You don't know what you're doing; listen to Mommy! I love you! Please just come and sit down with me so we can talk this over!"

      Janine did not respond, she only charged forward and slipped out of Lavinia's arms. Lavinia still held onto Janine's dress though, tearing the gauzy trim in a desperate attempt to hold her back.

      "You're ruining everything!" Lavinia sobbed. "We could be happy together: one family for the rest of our lives! Why are you doing this to me?"

      Janine inched forward, reaching for something that she couldn't see but which she knew was right in front of her. Soon she touched something hard and round, and tried to grab it with both hands. Lavinia was still pulling her back, but suddenly Janine's pink dress tore and she was free. She seized whatever it was, and lifted it high above her head.

      "Don't do that! No!"

      Smash! Janine hurled whatever-it-was straight into the ground, shattering it like a glass vase. There was a sound of a dull wind, like all of the air was being sucked out of the room. Janine's ears popped and everything turned white. The sound around her grew louder and louder, like a roaring sandstorm, and Janine had to cover her ears.

      The roaring sound, however, as it grew to its loudest volume, seemed to fade into the background, leaving Janine with a ringing in her ears. Slowly, even the ringing in her ears faded away, and the blinding white world that flooded into Janine's eyes dissolved into the familiar confines of the hotel room. Baby toys and luggage still littered the floor, scattered and broken. Lying in at Janine's feet were the fragments of Lavinia's device, now unidentifiable, but Lavinia herself had vanished.

      Suddenly the door to the other part of the hotel suite opened up, and Kelly, wearing her onesie and diaper, walked in rubbing her head.

      "Uh, Janine: what did we do last night?"

--------
      
      Janine was married the next week, and quite happily so. During the reception, while making her rounds with Jerry, thanking the guests and receiving congratulations, she couldn't help but pause at the one seat that was empty. Janine never heard from Lavinia again after that night, and though she could have visited her at her mansion, she never did. She blamed it on her busy schedule, but in truth there was nothing more to say.

      Janine didn't want to be angry at Lavinia. Whatever loneliness lingered in her friend's heart was punishment enough. Still, she could not pity her either. It was all over, even before that dramatic last gasp in their hotel room. Hopefully Lavinia would understand that soon. Maybe someday while walking sorrowfully through the nursery, pausing to wipe the dust off of the rocking horse or stooping to pick up a piece of dollhouse furniture, Lavinia would have a small realization of her own isolation. Maybe while sitting in her tall, red armchair, stiffly holding her teacup and staring out the window at the falling snow, Lavinia would find some peace of mind learn to move on. These were for Lavinia to find on her own, however, should she find the strength to search for them.

      Janine walked on, the skirts of her wedding dress billowing behind her. Jerry moved in close and stole a kiss, and Janine was enchanted. She became lost in his arms, and soon all else was forgotten.